@RogueRascal Okay, sorry in advance, but now you're really unclear on what exactly you are looking for and what is necessary for your needs.
You want a UT phone but you don't need it to be an actual phone? You need a mobile device, be it a laptop or phone, but can't clearly say that you do or do not need to have mobile celluar network or why you would.
Why explicitly do you need a desktop OS on a phone device? Is it the size? The portability? Touchscreen?
Why do you want a phone GUI, what does that do for you?
Why is a simple laptop not the best choice for you?
What can you compromise on? What are your absolute requirements?
You don't have to answer these questions on this forum in writing, but you need to know the answers yourself so you can explain it and we can offer help. Because you seem to be in a very, very unique situation that has something out there for the best possible solution. But only you have all of the info in order to find this solution. And frankly, you don't seem to be putting in much effort here. Everyone starts researching and learning about things from step 0. Just go to Google, or browse around this forum, and see what you find. Then you'll be able to ask about the capabilities or functionality of what you're after.